As you may have noticed, we've stopped with the predictions. Basically, when the "winner" is going lucky to break .500, it's just embarrassing. So having completed shredded all credibility that I might have dreamed about having as a college football expert with my asinine picks, I've decided to start telling you what to watch, with a handy viewing guide for the weekend's games.
All listings come from the invaluable Matt's College Sports on TV Website. Check your local listings for...blah blah blah. Consider this your guide for going into a football-related coma until the NFL games on Sunday.
FRIDAY
Boise St. @ San Jose St. (6 pm PT/9 pm ET, ESPN2)
Here we are, moving into November, and I'll be damned if Boise St. isn't there contending for a BCS bowl berth again. And their doing it without a huge contribution from Ian Johnson, the poster boy of their Fiesta Bowl win. See what happens when you get married?
Meanwhile, San Jose St. has a pair of brothers who, for the first time in NCAA history, are each leading a major statistical category: Carl Ihenacho (tackles for loss) and his brother Duke (interceptions). But of course, I care more about the fact that the Spartans now refer to them as The Nacho Brothers, a nickname so awesome, it takes The Four Horsement out behind the middle school and impregnates it.
In fact, they should just go the Joe Theismann route and change their name to match the marketing ploy. I can't imagine anything better than being named Duke Nacho, but I'm biased. Maybe Duke Pizza would be close.
SATURDAY
Early Morning Game: Texas Tech @ Kansas (9 am PT/noon ET, ESPN)
ZOMG! NO ONE PLAYS DEFENSE! THEY WILL SCORE 150 POINTS!
Usually this kind of hyperbole leads to 20-13 snoozers. But there is no way that these two offenses and defenses (I'm looking at you, Jayhawks) will let that happen. Ever play Madden, but actually with 15 minute quarters, only to get burnt out when the score reaches 500? You might have some of that fatigue taking place in this game...if you hate scoring in football, and are a lefty Commie terrorist pal-arounder.
Afternoon Game: Georgia @ LSU (3:30 pm PT/6:30 pm ET, CBS)
As you've been reminded all week, this is a NATIONAL TITLE ELIMINATION GAME, as the winner still has a shot at making it to the BCS Title Game, while the loser gets their second loss and is almost certainly done. I guess. I mean, wasn't that what we said after LSU lost to Kentucky in November last year for their second defeat?
That being said, I haven't seen a thing from LSU that would led me to believe that they can score enough points to keep up with Georgia. Save for one awful half against Alabama, and the Bulldogs are the clear No. 1 team in the country right now. Yeah, going into LSU is tough, but the Bulldogs are far and away the superior team.
Evening Game: Penn St. @ Ohio St. (5 pm PT/8 pm ET, ABC)
The only thing I'm getting more sick of hearing about than Joe Paterno's leg is the Ohio St. Cockroach effect, as in "you keep writing them out of the national title chase, and they keep coming back." They keep coming back year after year because while they might lose one game, other teams find ways to lose two or more. That being said, they'll need win out and get some help to have a chance. Meanwhile, I think one loss dooms Penn St. - like Alabama, pollsters don't really believe in them, I think, and are looking for an excuse to drop them down.
In other words, this is a NATIONAL TITLE ELIMINATION GAME. If this becomes a laugher at halftime, feel free to cruise over to ESPN to see if Alabama has finally fallen on its face yet (and wouldn't it be amazing if Tennessee was the team to do the trick) or check and see if you get Fox Sports to see a USC vs. Arizona game that I think is going to be far more competitive than most people. TRAP GAME!
1 comment:
I texted you about this last weekend, but I think my brother in law will be on suicide watch if Penn doesn't win.
These people (my sis and her husband) are retarded for college football. Its a religion for them. I don't understand it. I will NEVER understand it.
Example. They put on their Penn State attire (t-shirts, football jerseys, caps, sweatpants) then bring out the pom poms.
Everytime Penn scores, there is a dancing Nitney Lion that they turn on (if its only a field goal, its on for only a couple of seconds).
Everytime Penn scores, his MOM calls on the phone. Why? I don't know. I think just to say "did you see that?"
Then, when a penalty doesn't go their way, it means the refs are on the take.
Its quite frightening. You people are all crazy.
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