BOSTON - In what critics are calling another example of the New England Patriots' arrogance and lack of respect for their opponents, star wide receiver Randy Moss was accused today of running up the score on an unidentified woman's face.
"All year, the Patriots have refused to back down, even when the game was well out of reach," said Fox NFL analyst Jay Glazer. "Sources tell me that this woman put up as good of a fight as a 110 lb. female could against a 200-plus pound athlete. But clearly, she was overmatched. The respectful thing for Randy Moss to do would be to stop punching her in the face, or at least bring in a back-up WR or even the punter to finish things out. By staying in until the end, not only did Randy Moss risk injury to his valuable hands, but he did something that was the ultimate in disrespect to this woman. Other than, you know, punching her in the face."
For his part, Moss insisted that he had done nothing wrong.
"I'm a professional athlete, and I've always been taught to finish what you start," Moss said. "I'm sure she understands that as well, and would say so if her mouth wasn't so swollen from me punching her in the face."
Patriots head coach Bill Belichick would not comment on Moss' situation, other than to say in his weekly press conference that there's "always room" for improvement in anything a player does, including punching women in the face.
Moss's opponent was unavailable for comment, as she was recovering from having been repeatedly punched in the face by someone twice her size.
