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Jan 9, 2008

Carroll Seriously Considering Blackmailing Garrett for Annual Pay Raise

LOS ANGELES - Sources close to Pete Carroll said today that after discussions with Atlanta Falcons owner Arthur Blank about his team's head coaching vacancy, the USC Trojans head football coach is "seriously considering" receiving another lucrative pay raise from USC athletic director Mike Garrett.

"He's very close to making it known to athletic department officials that he's seriously considering leaving for the NFL," said the source. "Obviously, it's been a dream of his to return to the NFL. It's hard to put a price on that, although I'm sure that another million dollars or so a year from USC might be about right."

Garrett, who has given Carroll several contract extensions after the coach has flirted with several NFL teams in recent years, responded to the reports.

"I mean, he wouldn't leave here for Atlanta, right?," Garrett said in a brief interview while chainsmoking half a pack of Kools. "I mean, that place is a mess, right? And this is the best atmosphere in the country. He'd be crazy to leave. I know they're offering him total control, but he has that here. Why go back to the NFL!?!"

Garrett then alternated between manically laughing and violent weeping for several minutes before excusing himself to "make an emergency phone call."

Posted by The Duke of Everything 1 comments

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