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Nov 14, 2007

Indians Team Officials "Really Fucking Thrilled" with Sabathia's Cy Young

CLEVELAND - Immediately after Cleveland hurler C.C. Sabathia was named AL Cy Young winner this afternoon, Indians team officials held a press conference to express their sentiments over their pitcher's recognition. Even though their words conveyed excitement over the honor, their tone and actions left many reporters questioning the veracity of their statements.

Sabathia was named AL Cy Young winner over Boston Red Sox ace Josh Beckett. Cy Young voting occurs before the post-season begins, which might have been lucky for Sabathia. He was 1-2 with an 8.80 ERA in four post-season starts for the Indians before they were knocked out of the playoffs by the Red Sox. Meanwhile, Beckett was stellar in the playoffs, going 4-0 with a 1.20 ERA.

"Yeah, C.C. really showed what a 'big game' pitcher he was this season," said Indians GM Mark Shaprio, using "air quotes" the first of several times during the press conference. "You could say that, in a sense, there is no way our seasons could have ended the way it did with his 'performance' when it mattered most."

Cleveland manager Eric Wedge deflected a question on whether he would trade Sabathia for Beckett if he could.

"Oh, of course not," Wedge said. "Why would I want to switch out a guy who is great in the regular season for one of the best post-season pitchers in history? It's all about what you accomplish in the regular season against teams like Tampa Bay, Baltimore and Kansas City that counts, right?"

Wedge then concluded by making a stroking motion with his right hand near his crotch that appeared to mimic masturbation while rolling his eyes and making a "raspberry" with his mouth.

Posted by The Duke of Everything 1 comments

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