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Jun 26, 2008

Seriously,...Will Leitch is still there?

Several weeks ago, Deadspin editor/co-founder Will Leitch announced that he was officially leaving the blog to take on a contributing writer role at New York Magazine. At least I think it was a few weeks ago - it might have been four or five months ago for all I know. That's sure what the never-ending litany of stories about it on Deadspin and other sites is making it seem like.

What with all the farewells, speculation on who is going to replace him, and open weeping in the Deadspin comments, you would think that Walter Cronkite was retiring rather than that a pasty fellow who spent most of his days holed up in his Brooklyn apartment making dick jokes about Sean Salisbury was going to be going on to primarily write somewhere else - while still writing where he is now from time to time.

It's starting to feel like the last guest at the party. You know the one: it's 2:30 in the morning, everyone else has left, you're ready to finish cleaning up and/or pass out, and there's the one person who is still there, and still wants to talk to you about stock options, or the Colts defensive line, or African politics. And of course, he won't take the hint that it's time for him to leave, no matter how many exaggerated you make, or how many times you say things like "Wow, look how late it is. Don't you have a long drive home?"

I think this all points to how isolated and insular the sports blogosphere (and God, I hate using that pretentious fucking word) is. Essentially existing in your own, marginalized part of the world has caused dozens of otherwise sensible people to lose all manner of perspective, and start acting like this is Argentina in 1952, and Will Leitch leaving Deadspin equals Eva Peron dying. "Don't Cry for Me, Blogosphere" indeed. (Or, like this is Wisconsin and Will is Brett Favre.)

I like Will. I've had beers with the man. I've played "Guitar Hero" against him. I'm happy that he's moving on to a new challenge. But seriously...this all needs to wrap up soon. Someone start playing "Closing Time" over the bar loudspeakers. "You don't have to go home but you can't stay here" and all that jazz. The collective amount of their shit that everyone is losing speaks to a massive inferiority complex on the part of everyone in the blog community, leading to a massive overreaction to relatively minor news.

Oh, I'll be on vacation next week, so the frequency of posts will drop while I'm out. (I know, I know, down from "glacial" to "non-existent". Ha ha ha and shut up.) I however do fully expect daily eulogies and remembrances from fknmclane while I am gone. After 9 months of blogging, it's the least I could expect. Really, you're too kind.

Posted by The Duke of Everything 1 comments

BallHype: hype it up!

Dozen of tractors overturned in Fresno following College World Series win

FRESNO, CA - Law enforcement officials picked through the debris Thursday morning after celebrations turned violent following Fresno State's College World Series-clinching win over Georgia the previous night. Raucous fans left overturned hundreds of pieces of farm equipment and left countless heads of cattle, sheep and other livestock "startled but otherwise unharmed."

The harsh light of morning revealed tractors, harvesters and balers that had been overturned during the celebrations by out-of-control fans. Officers in helicopter patrols during the night had reported multiple incidents of fires being started in celebration, but later investigations discovered that these were merely cases of farmers performing regularly-planning burning of leaves, weeds and other agricultural rubbish.

Still, many area residents who went to sleep to the sounds of wild celebrations woke up to a tremendous shock this morning. John Mosesian is a farmer with a 1,200 acre grape vineyard in Fowler.

"I start going to bed, next thing I know, I hear all this shouting and hollering coming from down the road," Mosesian said. "I just thought it was the neighbors getting into it again, so I went to bed. I wake up in the morning, and someone's set my compost heap on fire, and my rotary tiller's been dumped on its side."

Mosesian paused to survey the damage before reflecting on the clean-up effort.

"It's a damn shame - it's going to take hours for Juan, Jose, Paco and Manuel to clean all this up, and they still have 12 hours of field work to do," he said, shaking his head. "They'll be here well past sundown."

Mosesian then drove off in his pick-up to his traditional two-hour breakfast at Lou's Diner with other hard-working farmers.

There were no confirmed reports of injuries or deaths following the incidents, although three Visalia men were arrested and charged with public intoxication and animal cruelty after tossing a pig into the air repeatedly in celebration. The pig was slaughtered as planned later in the morning and was said by observers to be "delicious."

Posted by The Duke of Everything 0 comments

BallHype: hype it up!