Handicapabiling Challenge Week 3 Picks

Well, we're each 1-1. McLane had to drink a raw egg last night. I have video of it that I'll post later today. It's outstanding.

So what's at stake this week? Loser has to eat a sesos taco. We're talking about a cow brain taco here. Not only is it gross, but the loser is running the real possibility of getting mad cow disease. Good times!

As usual, McLane's picks first, followed by mine:

* * *
McLane

Navy +1-1/2 at DUKE

Duke may have gained a coach who knows what the hell he is doing (at least sort of,) but the Midshipmen will still take care of business with not the double, but the TRIPLE (run for the hills!) option.

Iowa State +14-1/2 vs Iowa

The Hawkeyes are good at two things: getting arrested and losing to Chizik's Cyclones. As usual, they'll have more talent this year, but Kirk Ferentz has completely lost it and his team doesn't stand a chance of covering.

East Carolina -13 at TULANE

I got off the Pirate bandwagon last week and it cost me dearly. Never again. Bless me Skip Holtz, for I have sinned. I'm hopping right back on and hoping their defense does the same thing to the Green Wave that it did to Pat White and Noel Devine, eg/ie/fuck you: embarrassment.

Georgia -7-1/2 at SOUTH CAROLINA

Steve Spurrier is dead. So is Phillip Tattallgia. Moe Green. Slacci. Cuneo.

ARIZONA STATE -23 vs UNLV

Grandmama, the Plastic Man and Greg Anthony can suit up for the Runnin' Rebs' and it won't be enough to compete with the Devils and their complete and utter douchebag quarterback, Rudy Carpenter. I hate you, Rudy. I hate you.

***
The Duke

Kansas +3.5 at SOUTH FLORIDA

I have little to now faith that South Florida is anything other than a one-season fluke. Plus, there's a very real chance that Mark Mangino might eat Jim Leavitt before the game. Because he's fat.

MARYLAND +14.5 vs. California

A bit of a reach here. Yeah, I know that Maryland stinks. But Cal has a history of going on the road and falling apart against non-conference opponents. Plus, they can't possibly score 66 points again, right?

BYU -7.5 vs. UCLA

If it wasn't for the fact that a) BYU was the beneficiary of one of the worst decisions in PAC-10 officiating history (and that's saying a lot) and a lot of people think they should have lost that game, and b) UCLA was the beneficiary of one of the worst collapses in Tennesse football history (again, that's saying a lot), this spread would be at least two touchdowns. And if BYU is going to seemingly play five or six PAC-10 teams a year, why not just go ahead and make them a conference member?

Wisconsin -2.5 at FRESNO STATE

I know the Bulldogs. I've seen the Bulldogs. And I know that this is exactly the type of game where they come out and lay a giant egg on national TV. When expectations are highest, they perform the worst. If people thought that they had no chance against the Badgers, they'd probably win by 20. But since this is such a trendy "upset" pick that it's not really an upset anymore, they'll fall apart.

Ohio State (+11.5) at USC

Do I think that the Buckeyes are going to win this game? Absolutely not. But even with Beanie Wells "out" (using the biggest air quotes I can muster), will Ohio State make this competitive. Absolultely. Good teams have bad weeks, which is exactly what the Buckeyes had against Ohio last week. Meanwhile, I've learned nothing from USC's drubbing of Virginia other than how lousy Virginia is.

This will be a game until the fourth quarter, when USC scored a late TD to ice it.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 10:00 AM