BCS Title Game: The Morning After

Driving into work this morning, and then reading some of the blogosphere, there seemed to be an overwhelming consensus about why LSU beat Ohio St. 38-24 in the BCS Title Game last night: The Tigers simply had better athletes than the Buckeyes. "Too fast, too strong, too tough to contain!" is the refrain that I'm hearing over and over again. And while yes, the conventional wisdom is that Big Ten teams simply don't have the elite level of athletes that SEC schools do, I don't think it's that simple.

Getting past our preconceived notions, last night's game was simple, and brought up an equally disturbing trend that I've noticed among Big Ten schools: they simply cannot pass block. A big part of this, I think, goes back to where you come from. While Big Ten schools like Ohio St. might go cross-country to recruit skill players, the meat of their offensive line recruiting comes from the Midwest. And most high school teams in the Midwest are still run-first in nature. Offensive linemen don't work on pass blocking in the Midwest as much as they do in the West Coast or the South, where high school teams have much more balanced offenses. And pass blocking is a technique-based skill, versus run blocking which is much more about physical ability, size and power. You can try to teach pass blocking in college, but if the skills weren't developed in high school, you've got a long way to go.

I'll use my personal observations watching USC play Big Ten teams in the recent Rose Bowls as an example. In last year's Rose Bowl, Michigan's Chad Henne was sacked six times. In the 2004 Rose Bowl, Michigan's John Navarre was sacked nine times. This would kind of lead you to believe that this is just a problem with the Wolverines' offensive line. But in this year's Rose Bowl, Juice Williams was sacked five times by USC. The same "elusive" Juice Williams that was supposed to give USC fits all game. And make no mistake, the Illini has a lot of talent on offense - besides Williams, Rashard Mendenhall is going to be playing on Sundays, and Arrelious Benn was heavily recruited by USC.

But Illinois, like Michigan teams before them, could not cope with a sustained pass rush, and had no idea how to adjust to the variety of blitz packages USC was sending at them. These weren't just sacks, they were "linebackers coming in untouched and crushing the quarterback like an empty beer can" sacks.

Flash forward to last night. Ohio St. had shown early on that they had speed and athleticism at skill positions - witness Beanie Wells blowing past everyone for a 65-yard TD run on their first series. But if your line is getting pushed back play after play, it's going to wear on your line and they are going to start getting killed in the second half. And that's just what happened. They couldn't run, and Boeckman was scrambling for his life. Five sacks of Boeckman and a costly fumble on fourth down later, and that is pretty much that.

Again, it's history repeating - the Buckeyes were sacked five times in last year's BCS Title Game loss to an SEC team (Florida). Say all you will about "coping with speed" or "athletic disadvantages" - the thing that is holding the Big Ten back is their total inability to pass block, plain and simple. Get a Big Ten team down, where they have to pass and the defense can pin their ears back and rush hard? Look out.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 11:35 AM 5 comments  

Paul Maguire Stranded on Camera Crane Following Peach Bowl

ATLANTA – Embarrassed ESPN officials admitted on Thursday morning that analyst Paul Maguire had been abandoned on his end-zone camera boom position at the Georgia Dome since Monday night’s Peach Bowl broadcast, but stressed that a rescue effort was currently underway.

For the past several seasons, Maguire has acted as a third analyst on national broadcasts on ESPN and ABC. While Brad Nessler and Bob Griese work in the press box, Maguire is positioned on a giant camera boom behind one end zone, giving him what ESPN officials called a "unique perspective" on the game.

"While we would love for all of our broadcasts to perfect, anyone in the industry knows that this just isn't possible," said ESPN Executive Senior Vice President of Studio and Event Production Norby Williamson. "Unfortunately, there were a serious of mistakes and situations that led to Paul remaining on his broadcast post for an extended period of time."

Williamson said that several factors were involved. The responsibility for removing Maguire from his camera crane position usually falls on production assistant Scott "Scooter" Jones, but he missed the Peach Bowl to attend to the birth of his first child. The replacement production assistant who put Maguire onto his post had been called away on other production duties, but had failed to re-assign the job of lowering Maguire from the 15-foot tall crane.

"The fact that it was New Year's Eve didn't help matters," Williamson said. "A lot of the crew wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible, especially since the game had run into overtime. There were apparently some pretty 'bumpin' parties down in the Buckethead District, and our crew wanted to enjoy their evening. Somehow in the rush, no one thought to get Paul down."

Further complicating matters was the fact that Griese, designated as Maguire's "travel buddy", was apparently in no condition to assist after the game.

"We usually assign Bob to help make sure that Paul gets to the airport OK and doesn't get confused in a new city and become hopelessly lost again," Williamson said. "But to tell you the truth, Bob's been hitting the bottle pretty good since the Patriots won their last game and matched Bob's 1972 Dolphin team for a perfect record. When we were packing up and ready to leave 45 minutes after sign-pff, Bob had already gotten into the rye, and you know him and the rye."

It is believed that Macguire, 69, fell asleep after the final play of the game, and did not wake up until the next morning. He was found by a crew late Wednesday night coming into the Georgia Dome to set up for an upcoming Miley Cyrus concert. Maguire was reported to be in fair condition, although he requested a Tab soda and some Cream of Wheat after not having eaten or drank for almost 48 hours.

Initial attempts to remove Maguire from the crane were unsuccessful, as workers' attempts to shout instructions to Maguire on how to work the crane controls located on an armrest right next to him were hampered my Maguire's poor hearing and his, in the words of one rescue worker, "complete inability to work anything electronic that is more complicated than a toaster."

"I sensed that something was wrong on the shuttle back to the hotel," said Nessler. "Something didn't smell right - and I'm not just talking about Griese and his rye. Some smell was missing. Looking back now, it was the Old Man smell that Paul has. It's overpowering - like burnt coffee, Vicks and mothballs. Frankly, that's the reason he's out in the end zone instead of in the booth with us."

This marks the worst incident of a broadcaster being left behind after an assignment since Jim McKay was stranded in Austria following a broadcast of a Formula 1 race on ABC's Wide World of Sports in 1975 and was forced to eat color commentator Jackie Stewart to survive.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 10:28 AM 1 comments  

NCAA Places UCLA Football on "Proactive Probation"

LOS ANGELES – The NCAA announced on Monday that the UCLA football program was the first-ever school to be placed on “proactive probation,” following the Bruins’ hiring of former Colorado and Washington head coach Rick Neuheisel.

“In light of the multiple recruiting violations and lack of institutional control that will surely occur at UCLA within the next 12 months, we’ve decided to take action in advance and issue our punishment now,” said an official statement from the NCAA.

The statement from the NCAA including a laundry list of infractions that Neuheisel – who had a checkered past at both of his previous head coaching jobs – will “possibly to probably” commit in 2008. Included on the list:

• Exceeding number of recruiting visits
• Illegal contact with boosters
• Illegal contact with parents of potential recruits
• Illegal contact with hot sisters of potential recruits
• Sneaking underage recruits into NC-17 movies
• Larceny
• Participating in an underground street racing organization
• Wire-tapping Pete Carroll’s personal phone
• Selling graduate assistants into white slavery
• Taking the team out for ice cream after a tough loss

The punishment includes the loss of five scholarships over the 2008 season and a reduction in recruiting trips. UCLA athletic director Dan Guerrero said that while they were unaware that the NCAA had the authority to issue punishment in advance of any infractions, they accepted the decision.

“Frankly, we knew this was a possibility the day we hired Coach Neuheisel, but we just didn’t know it would happen literally the day after we hired him,” Guerrero said. “At least this way we can plan ahead instead of waiting for after the season to find out what the punishment would be.”

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 12:34 AM 2 comments  

Old Video Casts Doubt on Clemens' Claim to Have Never Taken Drugs

Roger Clemens has claimed that he never took any "banned substances at any time in my baseball career or, in fact, my entire life," but after an exhaustive search, I have uncovered long-buried evidence that Clemens obviously must have used massive amounts of drugs during his early playing days. Let me present to you Exhibit A:



Clearly, you would need to have broken into Dr. Hunter S. Thompson's satchel of medicinal supplements in order to agree to do something like that. Or, the director walked in on you getting "injected in the butt" in the clubhouse one day, and used this as blackmail to get you to agree to do said video.

Either way, I think this is proof that is just as conclusive as anything in The Mitchell Report. And if you think that using performance-enhancing bathing products isn't serious, just remember Ironhead Hayward (RIP):

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 11:57 AM 0 comments  

Bowden: Florida St. Cheating Scandal Simply Misguided "Turn Back the Clock" Stunt

TALLAHASSEE, FL – Florida State head coach Bobby Bowden said today that the cheating scandal that could decimate his roster for the Music City Bowl game against Kentucky and the 2008 season was not a symptom of a program out of control, but rather a unique “Turn Back the Clock” gimmick designed to remind fans and the team of the program’s glory days in the 1980s and early 1990s.

“You know, we were talking about doing something to remind these kids and all the fans just what Seminole football used to be all about,” said Bowden. “We talked about retro jerseys, or bringing back some old players. Then I got the inspiration. I said ‘Dad gum it, Florida State football ain’t about jerseys, or even the players. If we really want to turn back the clock, we need to get back to what we’ve always done best – get involved in a scandal that embarrasses the university, its fans and alumni.”

Bowden said that he was surprised at the uproar about the allegations involving up to 25 players and an online music history exam.

“It’s not like these guys are normally going to class anyway,” Bowden said. “We just thought it would be a change of pace to have them actually take the tests for themselves instead of just giving them their As – and when I say ‘take the test’, I mean ‘supply them with the answers for the test’, of course.”

Sincere thought was given to giving the team a shopping spree at a local sporting apparel store on the eve of the game, but Bowden staff quickly soured on the idea, saying that it was tough to “stack up to the pinnacle of this program’s achievements,” although they left the door open to use the idea in the future ahead of a game against Florida.

Bowden added that he thought his opponent for the Music City Bowl made it an ideal choice for this sort of “team-building activity.”

“I know the Kentucky program well, and I’ve known Coach Mumme for a long time,” Bowden said. “I’m sure he appreciates a good-natured, spirited scandal as much as the next person, and has his own thing cooked up for the bowl game.”

When informed that former Wildcats head coach Hal Mumme had been forced to resign in 2001 after a myriad of sanctions from the NCAA, Bowden stared blankly at the reporter for almost a minute before launching into a brief, rambling speech about the weather and how “things were different under FDR,” nearly choking on a Burger King hamburger and finally being led back to the team hotel by a school official.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 10:58 AM 0 comments  

Feeling sick

Some of you (about 3) might have been wondering about my whereabouts the past few days/ Vacation to Hawaii? Desperate flight out of country to avoid the authorities? Standing in line for Spice Girls tickets?

No, no and possibly but sadly not. Actually, my lovely six-month old daughter picked up what her pediatrician says is the rotavirus. Which led to my wife and I basically splitting time between helping her while she projectile vomited and us getting sick ourselves.

Good times.

But I'm not the only person in the world feeling sick right now. Let me introduce you to the Cal State University Monterey Bay basketball team. The Division II Warhawks (or whatever the hell they are) were leading Fresno State by three with seconds remaining. And then?

Well, I'm usually pretty skeptical about the YouTube "proof our team got screwed" videos that pop up from time to time. But in this case...yeah, you got screwed pretty hard:



The second offense - the travel just before the miracle shot is heaved up - is pretty blatant, but is somewhat excusable. But the first one - throwing the ball back inbounds after jumping five feet outside of the end line - is pretty atrocious. And yes, that's a ref about five feet away from him who should have noticed that unless it's white Bob Beamon, he probably wasn't going to be leaping from in-bounds and be able to catch the ball and make the toss.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 7:29 PM 1 comments  

The All-Mitchell Report Teams

Since the release of The Mitchell Report earlier today, several stories have mentioned that you could "create an All-Star team from the names on the list". Usually, that's a lot of hyperbole, but with some 80 names on the list, I decided to give it a shot. In doing the research, I found that you could create not just one but two RBI Baseball style rosters based on the names released today: one for Current Players and one for Former Players. And they'd be pretty decent, too - at least in their primes (you know, before the mysterious, complete drop-off in production and serious of nagging injuries).

CURRENT PLAYERS

C Paul LoDuca
1B Jason Giambi
2B Brian Roberts
SS Miguel Tejada
3B Troy Glaus
OF Gary Sheffield
OF Barry Bonds
OF Gary Matthews Jr.
DH Jack Cust
BENCH Jose Guillen
BENCH Greg Zaun
BENCH Jerry Hairston
BENCH Jay Gibbons
SP Roger Clemens
SP Andy Pettitte
RP Mike Stanton
RP Eric Gagne

Comments: Going by performance at their peak, this is a frightening group. The bench is a little weak, but I'd be surprised if you subbed anyone out if this was an RBI Baseball team - even for the 64-point power increase (video game steroids?). For some reason I was as surprised and disappointed to see Mike Stanton on the list - I didn't think that "crafty lefties" needed steroids to throw off-speed junk for one inning a night.

FORMER PLAYERS

C Benito Santiago
1B Mo Vaughn
2B Fernando Vina
SS Chuck Knobloch
3B Ken Caminiti
OF Lenny Dykstra
OF Jose Canseco
OF David Justice
DH Rafael Palmeiro
BENCH Matt Williams
BENCH Todd Hundley
BENCH Hal Morris
BENCH Rondell White
SP Kevin Brown
SP Denny Neagle
RP Kent Mercker
RP John Rocker

Comments: There were a couple of tough calls here. Todd Hundley, for about a two-year stretch, had a peak greater than Benito Santiago's (in fact, about as good as any catcher ever - big shock). But I decided that Benny gets the nod, based on longevity and also his Edward James Olmos-like skin (give the guy a break). I also had a tough time at 3B - Matt Williams had some great years, but Ken Caminiti was a former MVP. And is dead. It's tough to argue that. This is also a very solid team, but the relief staff is a mess - I guess quality relievers didn't understand the value of steroids and the quick recovery time associated with them until recently.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 4:59 PM 2 comments  

The Mitchell Report Afterglow: Is This It?

Now that I've had a few hours to digest everything, here's my thought on The Mitchell Report:

Meh.

I think that Tim Kawakami of the San Jose Mercury News hit it right on the head: this was just enough juicy meat (Roger Clemens! Andy Pettitte! Miguel Tejada!) to keep the media satisfied, without actually addressing any of the big picture problems or assigning real blame (or consequences) for transgressions in the past all the way up the baseball food chain.

Mitchell's expressed belief that MLB should not punish people named in the report for past actions? Sound similar to Mark McGwire's "I'm not here to talk about the past, I'm here to focus on the positives in baseball" disaster in front of Congress? Probably not, because George Mitchell is a skilled politician and public speaker, used to saying a lot without saying much at all. Mark McGwire, on the other hand, is a lunkhead.

(Of course, Mitchell left the door open for punishing players if their actions were particularly offensive and therefore punishing them was, as the Commissioner would see fit, "in the best interests of baseball". More on this loophole in a second.)

So if we're not going to punish people based on the report, what's the point of naming names? If the idea is to catalog what happened merely as a way to develop plans moving forward, why are there 80 people who have been publicly linked to steroid and other substances, when referring to them as Player X would have served the same purpose?

Because the public and the media don't want that - we all want fresh meat. We've picked apart Barry Bonds' carcass to the point that all we have left is marrow. We're sick of talking about him, but who else could we publicly call a user and a cheat? A few journeymen and average players? Not good enough. The public needed a few new "faces" of the steroid era who could receive a show trial and be summarily hung out to dry.

And the proof: the meat of the report? Anyone looking for smoking guns should look elsewhere. There are some exceptions where there is pretty convincing, hard physical evidence linking someone to steroid purchases (it amazes me that athletes - or anyone - would purchase something illegal and shady with a check that has their name right on it. Can't they find a way to pull out cash from the bank? They might as well just put "For: HGH supplies" in the Memo section of the check.)

But for the big two - Clemens and Pettitte - as well as a majority of the players mentioned? A lot of hearsay and unsubstantiated testimony from witnesses/accusers with less-than-perfect reputations. In what should be a surprise to no one, Clemens' lawyer has already released a statement on behalf of his client, saying that Clemens:

...vehemently denies allegations in the Mitchell report that he used performance-enhancing steroids, and is outraged that his name is included in the report based on the uncorroborated allegations of a troubled man threatened with federal criminal prosecution.

And this is going to be the pattern you see time after time in the next few days: athlete expresses anger/sadness/disappointment that his name was released with this report based on baseless/unfounded/uncorroborated charges leveled by someone with a vendetta/a known criminal/a desperate former teammate facing a lifetime ban. And it will be hard to really argue, even if you know they are lying: most of these allegations wouldn't hold up in a criminal or civil court. Hell, the majority are so flimsy that a newspaper editor wouldn't run a story based just on them if the reporting was done by their writers.

But because "it's in The Mitchell Report", it's all going to be reported by every media outlet, with little context or additional reporting happening. The sad part is that there are nuggets of new information in the report, mainly about how team officials routinely either a) turned a blind eye or b) acknowledged steroid allegations or use when scouting players for potential trades. But interestingly, The Mitchell Report doesn't index each team or baseball front office executive is implicated in the report like it does for the players, so you probably won't be hearing as much about this.

(But, in order to drive home the point that Bud Selig - Mitchell's good friend and "boss" - was doing all he could to stop steroids and investigate wrong-doing despite the despotic and evil players union, the report does contain a letter the Union sent to its players urging them not to talk to the Mitchell Report committee without lawyers. Because the Union would rather direct it's workforce of minimally educated players talk with former Senators and investigators by themselves and "hope for the best!" Yeah, doesn't make sense to me, either.)

So what now? The Big Three - Clemens, Pettitte, Tejada - will be left out in stocks in the town square for the rest of the winter. If they survive, and the public has forgotten about them and moved on to some new sports scandal de jour, then Commissioner Selig will quietly let them go and heed the words of Senator Mitchell to let bygones be bygones. If the public is still baying for blood, however, then suddenly MLB will decide it's "in the best interest of baseball" to make examples of them by giving them lengthy suspensions/banning them from baseball/banning them from the Hall of Fame. Which would be insane, since the all-time HR king is currently awaiting a Federal trial on steroid related charges, with a mountain of evidence that's a lot more solid than what The Big Three have against them. And he's still going to play next season.

So I hope everyone enjoyed things today - the goofy "lists" being passed off as fact beforehand (again, Rich Garces wasn't a giveaway?), the build-up of the press conference followed by Senator NyQuil's insomnia-curing speech, the hours of post-announcement hand-wringing. At the end of the day, we're basically back where we started.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 3:53 PM 0 comments  

The Mitchell Report list

So remember that Internet list that I linked to earlier today? Turns it is was about 50 percent garbage. The Mitchell Report is out, and here's the actual list of players named.

I'll post more later once I have time to digest things. But let me just say this.

Jack Cust? NOOOO!!!

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 12:00 PM 0 comments  

A-Rod re-signs with the Yankees for $275 million

First the guy has the nerve to announce that he's opting out of his contract during a World Series game. So what does Alex Rodriguez do for an encore? Try to upstage another celebration of baseball in the modern era, otherwise known as "Mitchell Report Day". Just when you were prepared for a full day of rumors, denials, tearful admissions and speculation, A-Rod had to ruin it by signing a 10-year, $275 million contract with the Yankees, assuring that all of this wonderful, glorious steroid talk with be partially overshadowed by something as pointless as baseball-related matters.

What a jerk. No wonder everyone hates him. That, and the aloof, smug attitude. And the choking in the clutch.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 10:22 AM 1 comments