Classic 80's and 90's RBI Baseball moments

I don't think it's any secret the Duke and I have an affinity for all things RBI Baseball. The two of us flew halfway across the country a few years ago to participate in a tournament, so trust me when I say we're far crazier than you.

For the first time since Nolan Ryan and Don Sutton were young pups, the stretch run of Major League Baseball doesn't have an RBI Baseball veteran involved. With the looming incarceration of Roger Clemens and Julio Franco pushing his walker around the basepaths somewhere in Mexico, the big leagues are bereft of men who were once represented on the NES by pixelated, short, fat, white guys.

Now is as good a time as any to remember a simpler time, and take a look back at a few memorable baseball moments from the 80's and 90's...through an RBI Baseball colored lens.

First we have the infamous safe call made by Don Denkinger in the '85 World Series between the St. Louis Cardinals and the Kansas City Royals:


And if it weren't obvious enough the wrong call was made, here's a closeup:


Staying with the Royals, we have one of my all-time favorite baseball moments, George Brett going ballistic in the Pine Tar Game:


And now some more George Brett goodness (loyal reader Bonny should be pleased,) complete with Morganna and her friends:


Next up is an image we've featured on Your Face is a Sports Blog before, Vince Coleman being swallowed up by the Tarp Monster:


Jose Canseco was recently in the news for getting knocked out, but let's not forget, it wasn't the first time that lump three feet above his ass got drilled:


The Braves unreal run of over a decade of division titles is mercifully over, but back in '91, they were the darlings of baseball, going worst to first and facing the Twins in the World Series. Who can forget fat Kent Hrbek pulling Ron Gant off first base?


Or Kirby Puckett's memorable catch against the plexiglass?


Last but not least, let's all thank our lucky stars for Enrico Palazzo:





-big hugs and sloppy kisses go to Beefmaster, Beejay, the Duke, Teddyballgame, and JerryD, for graciously supplying the images

Posted by McLane at 9:27 AM 2 comments  

Manny traded to the Dodgers and no, I'm not being funny this time

In case you haven't heard, the Red Sox actually dealt Manny Ramirez before today's trade deadline, but his destination wasn't Florida, as originally thought. Manny is now a Dodger, which is stunning since the Los Angeles Times reported in today's paper that about as much dealing as the Dodgers expected to do was to try to get Greg Maddux. This is, to put it mildly, much bigger.

First, I didn't think this would happen, period. It seems like Manny's been perpetually almost traded every season, with the media saying something like "unlike last season, when they were able to patch their differences, there's really no going back this time - the relationship is too broken to continue and Red Sox have to trade Manny Ramirez ." And then every year they don't trade him, and everyone goes about their business as he proceeds to get hotter than hell in September and October and mash the ball all over the place.

But I guess the fact that he wasn't coming back next season meant that the Red Sox had all the incentive they needed to make this deal work. And frankly, they made out like bandits. Looking at the numbers for this season, Jason Bay's production is almost equal to Manny at the plate this season. Plus, he's six years younger and locked up through the end of next year at a fraction of what Manny is making. It's a no-brainer.

And for the Pirates? Well, they get prospects. A lot of prospects. But they desperately need depth - the fact that several of the other team's Triple A prospects are going to start right away tells you all you need to know about them.

But what about the Dodgers? What are they getting out of this? Since the Red Sox are paying a bulk of Manny's contract for this season, there isn't a money problem. But, they had to give up Andy LaRoche, who was the No. 1 future option at the sinkhole that has been third base for the Dodgers. (Unless they plan on re-signing Casey Blake, which they may have to after this deal.)

There's no question that they get a premier hitter, even at 36. After all, as ESPN shouts at me seemingly every day, he is ONE OF THE TOP FIVE RIGHT-HANDED HITTERS OF ALL TIME! But they've also added to a position where they already have about 27 options, and made their defense significantly worse no matter what they do.

The logical outfield at this point would be (I guess) Manny in LF, Matt Kemp in CF and Andre Ethier in RF. Which means Andruw Jones and Juan Pierre are riding the pine. Which makes sense from a baseball standpoint, since the only thing more absymal than Pierre's OBP is Jones'...well, everything. But that also means that you lose good defense and speed, and have to play Matt Kemp out of position (he isn't a natural CF). Oh yeah, and you have $17 million in contracts sitting on the bench every night in those two players alone, and you didn't address the really key areas, like starting pitching and shortstop.

And the real bottom line is this: the Dodgers weren't going to win the World Series before this trade, and they really aren't good enough to win it now. It should be enough to put them past the Diamondbacks in the God-awful NL West, but so what? I know "anything can happen" in the post-season, but come on.

I suspect that Dodgers GM was feeling the heat after the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, California, USA made the bold move of trading Corey Kotchman for Mark Teixiaxairaiaxia even though they have a double-digit lead in the AL West and the best record in baseball. He had to make a blockbuster move in order to get the interest back on the Dodgers, and this sure does that job just fine.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 4:28 PM 0 comments  

The Gruesome Collision of Sports and Entertainment: Magnum P.I. Edition

From time to time, athletes make guest appearances on TV shows. This doesn't happen as much anymore, and certainly not as much as the 1980s, when seemingly every kid making a big league roster got at least a guest spot on "Small Wonder" (I think it was in a collective bargaining agreement). Thank God for YouTube, which lets us relive the train wrecks that happen when entertainment and sports collide.

For example, here are the legendary Detroit Tigers double play combination of Alan Trammell and Lou Whitaker doing a guest spot on "Magnum P.I." with a haggard looking Tom Selleck. The spot makes sense, given the character's love to the Tigers. Too bad no one thought to find out of either of these guys could act:



As McLane pointed out, Trammell's necklace kicks all kinds of ass. And Lou Whitaker resembles LenDale White minus about 1,000 Quarter Pounders with Cheese.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 11:52 AM 0 comments  

Red Sox trade Manny to Boston, hope he doesn't catch on

BOSTON - The Red Sox, ending weeks of speculation, traded disgruntled star Manny Ramirez to Boston today, hoping that the eccentric slugger wouldn't catch on that it's the same place.

The plan appeared to be working, as Ramirez told a throng of reporters that he was "very happy" to be heading to Boston, and "glad that the Red Sox granted his wish to leave."

"Like I said yesterday, I love the Red Sox fans but the team doesn't deserve me," Ramirez said as he was cleaning out his locker following the trade announcement. "I'm happy that I'm going somewhere like Boston, where they know how to win and treat players right."

Ramirez then asked reporters what the weather was like in Boston, and if he needed to bring a coat before continuing to remove items from his locker, including: a cactus, a Betamax player, a giant vat of mint jelly and his pet iguana Kaz.

Red Sox team officials informed Ramirez of the trade this morning. He had spent the night at the team offices, having had a sleepover with several friends in a make-shift tent made of old jerseys.

"We really had to sell it to him that he had been traded by the Red Sox to Boston," said an anonymous source in the Red Sox front office. "So we told him how difficult it would be to see him in a uniform other than the Red Sox, but that he was going to a team in Boston that was in the middle of a pennant race and that really needed him to play at 100 percent. He seemed excited about the opportunity, although mainly he kept asking me if he could wear my gorilla suit again. I mean...a gorilla suit."

Officials gave Ramirez a plane ticket that would take him from Logan Airport to Manchester, NH, where he would then be driven in a limo back into Boston. The plane will also stop over in Hartford, CT, "just to make it seem like he went far away."

There has been concern that Ramirez might get suspicious upon seeing the Green Monster upon his "arrival" at Fenway Park, and might start putting two and two together. In response, the Red Sox announced that they will be painting the wall slightly blue-green, and if that fails, telling Ramirez that he's just imagining things.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 10:40 AM 0 comments  

The Inaugural Your Face is a Sports Blog Fan Fest is this Saturday in Phoenix

You heard right: due to popular demand, Your Face is a Sports Blog will be holding our first-ever Fan Fest this Saturday at Manzanita Speedway in Phoenix in conjunction with that night's sprint car racing. Both myself and fknmclane will be there, signing autographs and taking questions from the fans. We'll have prizes to give away* and there may even be some special guests.

Make sure you look for us at the Your Face is a Sports Blog booth at the parking lot outside of the track before the races. We'll be the ones covered in empty MGD cans!

*there are no prizes.

So yeah, I'm flying out to Phoenix this weekend to go to the sprint car races with fknmclane. He's never been, and I think he's pretty pumped about it. I hope that it's a good night of racing, and not a complete mess. The fact that I was told be the racetrack over the phone last night that racing had been cancelled, sending me into a downward spiral of depression, only to have fknmclane be told that no, racing was on this Saturday, doesn't bode well. But whatever - we're going to have a wild time, get into a lot of trouble, and have blog posts for weeks about it.

Note: Since I'm writing about the trip, it's now a business expense. Suck on it, IRS!

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 10:00 AM 2 comments  

The Greatest Sports Highlight Video Ever Created

We've all seen ESPN's Ultimate Highlight at some point in our lives, and while the editing is crisp and the plays are spectacular, the songs used are consistently awful. This is how it's done:



Catchy as all hell song + goofy highlights + 80's fashion = WINNER

UPDATE: The Duke has his panties in a bunch because "Centerfield > Walk of Life." I would agree wholeheartedly that the song and video are indeed better but Centerfield is all baseball and more of a look back at the golden age of the sport. As such...ah, fuck it, here's our President's favorite song, Centerfield, by John Fogerty:

Posted by McLane at 8:54 AM 2 comments  

Earthquake!!!

And no, not this guy. We just had a pretty decent jolt here in Southern California - a 5.8, centered about 45 miles away from downtown in Chino Hills. I'm on the 25th floor of a building on "rollers" - basically, it's designed to sway pretty significantly in order to minimize any structural damage. And it did sway - picture being in the cabin of a boat during a really bad storm, and that's about what it was like. Some girl at my friend Michael's office threw up because it was her first earthquake, and also because she is a girl.

Also, BLAARGHFHGH!!!

But seriously, I'm hearing sirens around my neighborhood, and while a 5.8 is big, it you wouldn't think that it would cause more than some minor structural damages. Still, I hope everyone out closer to the epicenter is OK.

And before anyone asks, no, this wasn't caused by Andruw Jones doing jumping jacks. There is no way his fat ass could even get off the ground.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 12:07 PM 1 comments  

Favre ready to send in reinstatement letter as soon as he can find a damned stamp

GULFPORT, MISSISSIPPI - At a hastily-called press conference outside of his home, Brett Favre today announced that he had signed his letter asking the NFL for reinstatement, and that he planned on mailing it in as soon as he could find a stamp.

"I've turned this damned place upside down looking for a stamp, and I ain't got anything," Favre said. "Maybe if you reporters had one, maybe in your wallets or purses, that would be a big help."

Favre said he looked in every place in his house for stamps, as well as the glove compartments of his family cars. Although he was unsuccessful in finding stamps, Favre did find a Super Bowl in his kitchen junk drawer.

"I wonder which one this is?," Favre asked. "I bet it's the one against Atlanta - to tell you the truth, that win didn't mean all that much."

Favre said that he had even gone on the US Postal Service Web site, after his friend Bucky told him that you could buy postage there. However, after 45 minutes, Favre abandoned the attempt.

"It was pretty confusing - you had to feed the envelope into the printer a certain way for it to print the postage on, and I'm no good with that sort of thing," he said. "What if they print up the wrong postage, and it gets sent back to me. It's better if I can just find a stamp."

Hopes had been raised in the Favre household earlier in the morning when a stamp booklet was found in a bedroom dresser drawer. However, those hopes were quickly dashed when it was discovered that the booklet was empty.

Later in the afternoon, ESPN's Chris Mortensen reported that Favre had found a mostly full booklet of 29 cent stamps, but was unsure if using two of those stamps would cause the post office not to deliver it because of "over-postaging it." There were also unconfirmed reports that Favre had attempted to remove a stamp from a received envelope with steam.

Favre said that as a last resort he would go into town to buy a stamp at the post office. However, he was relucant to do so, as this would likely lead to his wife "having me run errands and do a bunch of shopping and stuff. Nag, nag, nag - why do you think I'm so desperate to come back?"

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 10:16 AM 0 comments  

How to best spend $9 at Chase Field

I give you, the Big Dogs.

Pretty little maids all in a row

From left to right, here are the gory details:

Chicago Dog: Served Chicago-style with a cucumber and pickle spears, tomato wedges, green relish, mustard, white onion, sport peppers and celery salt.

Wisconsin Dog?: note - this is a new one, and I'm not familiar with it, but it looks to have sauerkraut and fries on it.

Cincinnati Dog: Served with diced onions, jalapeño cheese, spicy chili and green jalapeños.

Arizona Dog: Served with nacho cheese sauce, chorizo sausage, and fresh corn tortilla strips.

Texas Dog: (TOP) Served with cheddar cheese, chopped bacon, signature barbeque sauce and crispy onion rings.

You might be saying to yourself, I ain't payin' no nine dollars for no hot dog, but really, when compared to the $8 paid for a 20oz. beer, a Big Dog is an absolute steal.

It's a whole lot of weenie. So much, a fork and knife are necessary.

Being that it's covered with your choice of unhealthy goodness, it's the most bang for you buck at Chase Field. I can't speak for the Arizona, Cincy, Wisconsin or Chicago dogs, but trust me when I say the Texas Dog is the real deal. Dare I say it shouldn't be messed with?

Drenched with both BBQ and cheese sauce and then topped with bacon (BACON!) and at least four giant onion rings, it's all I could ever ask for and more from an artery clogging casing of various meats.

If you're ever at Chase Field, be sure and make your way over to the Big Dog stand in the main concourse. It'll be the best $9 you'll ever spend at a ball game. You won't regret it.

That part comes later.

Posted by McLane at 9:24 AM 3 comments  

Albert Belle approves of this brawl

• Tickets for you, your wife and two kids to a minor-league baseball game: $40.
• Hot dogs, soda and popcorn for family: $35.
• Getting drilled with a baseball thrown at 90 mph by a pissed off pitcher trying to chuck it into the other team's dugout during a brawl: Thousands of dollars of medical bills
• Getting drilled with a baseball thrown at 90 mph by a pissed off pitcher trying to chuck it into the other team's dugout during a brawl: A six-figure settlement on your lawsuit just waiting to happen.
• Getting drilled with a baseball thrown at 90 mph by a pissed off pitcher trying to chuck it into the other team's dugout during a brawl: Priceless.

If you didn't see it on SportsCenter or your local news last night, that's the souvenir that a lucky fan walked away from a game featuring a wild brawl between Dayton and Peoria thanks to Peoria pitcher Julio Castillo. And when I say "walked away from", I mean "was taken on a stretcher to the hospital from" which explains why Castillo got to spend the night in jail.

Here's a fan video of the brawl, complete with Castillo going nhuts for several minutes after the fight is over, and a bunch of mouthy, idiot fans who probably wouldn't be so loud if there wasn't a big screen separating them and the large, irate professional athlete. (Note: the fan is not only a loudmouth but also swears a lot, so NSFW if you are using speakers in the open:



Throwing a baseball at a fan should get you kicked out for life. Unless you are Albert Belle and a really good hitter, then maybe it should get you a few games supension.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 9:46 AM 0 comments