Dear Bret Favre

Stop it! Seriously, fucking stop it! I've been laid up in bed dealing with the effects of a bad reaction to a tetanus shot (don't ask), and this is all I've heard or seen. So stop it and just go away! Now all of my friends and family are calling me and asking my opinion about you, like I care. And I don't. No one outside of Green Bay wants to see you play next year, and even they are getting at the end of their ropes. You're turning into the NFL's Roger Clemens, except replace "HGH" with "painkillers". Just leave! Go! Shoo! Shoo!

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 11:09 AM 1 comments  

Kenyan distance runners make sprint champ feel inadequate

NAIROBI - Sitting in the locker room, Paul Ochuka should have been thrilled - he had just qualified for the 2008 Beijing Olympics by winning the 100 meter dash at the Kenyan Olympic Trials. But all he says he felt was shame and embarrassment thanks to repeated, spirit-crushing teasing by Kenya's contingent of elite distance runners.

"When I got back to my locker, there was a note attached to it," Ochuka said. "I was hoping it was going to be a congratulatory note, but I should have known better. It simply said "Way to run a whole 100 meters, pussy.' It was unsigned, but I have a good idea about who did it."

Ochuka said that the constant teasing and hazing have only heightened a gnawing feeling of what he calls "inadequacy" over the relative short distances he runs versus the long distances that Kenya's more famous track athletes run.

"Everyone says 'Oh, why should we care if you can run 100 meters in 10 seconds - try running for 10,000 meters and then we can talk'," he said. "No one cares about being The Fastest Man in Kenya, just The Man in Kenya Who Can Run a Very Long Distance the Fastest."

Ochuka added that Kenyan track and field officials have not helped the cause, giving little priority to sprint races. For example, the finals of the 100 meter dash at the Olympic Trials were held in between laps of the 5,000 meter quarterfinals, with sprinters asked to come onto the front stretch, run, and head back to pick up their starting blocks before the distance runners finished their lap.

Kenyan Track & Field Federation president Martin Oboye refused to comment, since he "could not believe" that Kenya actually had sprinters.

Despite the lack of support from other track athletes and fans in Kenya, Ochuka said he was proud to be able to represent his country in the Olympics by marching into Beijing's Olympic stadium with his fellow athletes.

"Unless they do what they did at the African Games," he said, referring to the prank where the team parked their bus 10 miles away from the stadium and ran there. "I'm not running that far again - this time I'll take the bus or something."

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 11:14 AM 1 comments  

Quick hits

• I guess Spain can't win at every sporting event: Bulls 18, Spaniards (and assorted tourists) 0
• Oh, it's OK, ex-Viking Darrion Scott wasn't trying to kill his two year-old son by putting a plastic bag over his head - he was just playing "Boogeyman" with him. Surprisingly, the boy's mom did not find this so assuming.
• Remember the Tour de France? Know what's crazy - they're still having it! In fact, it's going on right now - some German guy is leading it or something.
• Serious news alert: Rich Harden traded by the A's with Chad Gaudin to the Cubs for various cans of corn.
  

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 3:50 PM 0 comments  

Statuatory thinking: Ideas for alternative baseball stadium statues

Yesterday the Los Angeles Times ran an interesting story about statues at baseball stadiums (not the kind found on the field, like Miguel Cabrera). The story talked about why statues are a perfect match to commemorate great players, and listed screw-ups real (only the Cubs would have a typo on their statue) and not (yes, Babe Ruth was a lefty, and yes the statue in Baltimore shows him with a righty catcher's mitt, but that is actually historically accurate - catcher's mitts were all righty at that time).

A sidebar story talked about the fact that there are no statues at Dodger Stadium, and the possibility that one or more might be added. They spoke with Howard Cole of BaseballSavvy.com site, who has been pushing for a statue of Sandy Koufax to go up at Dodger Stadium for years. And while I have nothing but respect for Sandy Koufax, he somehow isn't "iconic" enough for me. Because more than anything else, a statue should symbolize something - it is the physical embodiment of what you think of when you think of someone or something.

So I started to ask myself what the perfect statue would be to represent the Los Angeles Dodgers at Dodger Stadium. If I just closed my eyes and thought "Los Angeles Dodgers", what immediate associations did I have.

A few ideas came to mind:

• Steve Garvey surrounded by children - dozens and dozens of children
• A fan in a Raiders hat and Dodgers jersey pouring beer on a 6 year-old wearing a Giants hat
• Jackie Robinson in Heaven, watching Al Campanis on God's TV and weeping
• Fred Claire giving Pedro Martinez a handshake and a plane ticket to Montreal

But the one thing that symbolized the Dodgers, more than anything else, would be this: Tommy Lasorda, naked except for a towel barely covering his sweaty midsection, at the post-game buffet filling his plate with mounds of linguini while screaming profanities at the clubhouse boys. It's a mental image I picked up while reading John Feinstein's "Play Ball" several years ago, and no amount of therapy has been able to scrub it from my memory. (Perhaps a more accurate statue would have two sides - one with Lasorda smiling and hugging kids, while the other had him foaming at the mouth about Dave Kingman - but I disgress.)

The whole exercise got me thinking about what statues should be outside of other stadiums. Not even Rodan's "Thinker", Michaelangelo's "David" or John Heisman's "Trophy" will have the power to move people that these monuments will have:

Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim: Although it would be relevant to recognize today's fans with a statue of a family holding a map of Los Angeles with a look of great confusion while trying to find Angels Stadium, nothing symbolizes the majority of the team's history more eloquently than a bronze statue of Donnie Moore holding a shotgun.

St. Louis Cardinals: Although a giant bottle of andro would be a perfect symbol for the Mark McGwire era, and a bust of Tony Larussa's bleary, drunken eyes from his mug shot would have quiet dignity, nothing would be more appropriate than a statue of the Cardinal's greatest base stealer, Vince Coleman. Of course, in order to ensure that no rusting or other damage would occur from rain, the statue would need to be mangled under a tarp at all times. (Note: I really like the idea of all toilets having a statue of Joaquin Andujar behind them smashing it to bits with a baseball bat, but this might not be doable.)

Baltimore Orioles: My first thought was to have Tony Tarasco frozen in time, pointing up to Jeffrey Maier and appealing to Richie Phillips for the interference call that never came, a more fitting tribute to the "Spend a Lot, Win Little" Orioles is the Eternal Money Flame, a giant dollar sign similar to an Olympic torch, except that it is perpetually fed by $100 bills.

Boston Red Sox: A statue of Wade Boggs passed out in a plane seat covered in dozens of empty beer cans and fried chicken legs is a great visual. And nothing would summarize the prickly nature of the greatest player ever to wear a Red Sox jersey than an action statue of Ted Williams clocking a reporter. But to my mind, the choice has to be of Curt Schilling, meticulously applying a paint brush to his sock before Game 6 of the 2004 ALCS. After all, the team's name is "The Red Sox" and it's also Schilling's only chance to be immortalized in such a way - it's not like he's getting a bust at Cooperstown. Plus, you could probably save on upkeep as he would almost certainly be there to polish and clean the statue every day to make sure it received maximum attention.

New York Yankees: They have enough statues, thanks. But if we have to create a new one for them, let it be Billy Martin snapping his own pitcher's (Ed Whitson) arm in a bar fight.

Toronto Blue Jays: I haven't worked out how you would make a statue of that couple "enjoying themselves carnally" in the hotel room in centerfield at the SkyDome with the windows open during a game (some sort of diorama?). So the choice here is former manager Tim Johnson, carrying three of his fallen comrades on his back to safety while single-handedly killing a dozen Viet Cong during his heroic tour of duty that he did in his mind.

Chicago White Sox: This is a tough one: a bunch of hippies blowing up Donna Summer records, or Ozzie Guillen strangling Jay Marrioti? Let's go a different route and celebrate something amazing - the game the White Sox played in shorts. Nothing says "immortal tribute" like Jim Spencer in short shorts, exposing his marble-white thighs while stretching for a ball a first.

Cleveland Indians: This really should be a series of statues paying tribute to Albert Belle placed throughout the stadium. Scenes include: him driving a car and running over trick-or treaters (placed in the parking lot); him heaving a ball into the chest of a heckler (located in foul territory in left) and his teammates retrieving and him glaring at a reporter with murderous hate (placed in the locker room).

Tampa Bay Rays: Simply put - Rocco Baldelli being wheeled into an MRI machine.

Detroit Tigers: I like the idea of a statue of Denny McLain arm in arm with several Italian "made men". However, I love the idea of a statue in the stands featuring Ty Cobb wailing away on a guy with no arms.

Kansas City Royals: Again, I'm torn - George Brett foaming at the mouth when flying out of the dugout during The Pine Tar Incident, or George Brett on the crapper with a tube of Preparation H in his hand? You can't go wrong either way, although I also insist on a statue of Bob Hamelin leaving the stadium in his uniform at the main exitway.

Oakland Athletics: Another easy one - Jose Canseco sticking a needle into Mark McGwire's ass while Tony Larussa looks off in the distance.

Seattle Mariners: I would go with the Mariner Moose writhing on the ground in rollerblades clutching his broken ankle, but I hate to honor mascots. Instead, let's honor a real American hero - let's have a statue of Jay Buhner vomiting on command.

Florida Marlins: A touching scene of Moises Alou, Kevin Brown and Gary Sheffield on an auction block going to the highest bidder.

New York Mets: A tribute to the 1986 World Series winners, featuring Darryl Strawberry and Doc Gooden playfully skiing down a mountain of blow.

Philadelphia Phillies: The Lenny Dykstra Commemorative Tobacco Juice Spit Fountain.

Chicago Cubs: Having an image of Moises Alou screaming and pointing at a dopey-looking Steve Bartman just seems mean. Instead, it's time to honor a legend: Harry Carey shirtless and face down in a pool of his own vomit, clutching a Bud in one hand and a hot dog in the other.

Arizona Diamondbacks: Time to immortalize the defining moment in a legendary pitcher's career: Randy Johnson plunking a wayward dove with a fastball, causing it to explode in an orgy of feathers.

Colorado Rockies: The new team is great, but let's not forget the legends who built the franchise. I'd like to see a lifesize statue of Vinny Castilla (Note: the immense size and weight of this statue would require massive reinforcement of the concrete below in order to avoid the statue falling into a massive sinkhole from which only Brendan Fraser can escape.)

Pittsburgh Pirates: It would be fitting but almost impossible to depict Barry Bonds and Bobby Bonilla glumly cleaning out their lockers after another playoff loss. Instead, put up a statue of Jason Kendall running a stride after first base on his ankle with the sole of his foot staring up at him. (Note: vomit bags should be made available.)

San Diego Padres: You could have Tony Gwynn getting his 3,000th hit in a Segway because he's too fat to actually get to first, but I actually don't think that's historically accurate. Instead, it's time to honor the team's lone NL MVP - Ken Caminitti "heroically" fighting off "flu-like symptoms" by coming to bat with an IV in his arm, a beer can attached to straws on his helmet and all manner of needles still in his butt.

San Francisco Giants: Yes, a lifesize bust of Barry Bonds would be great. But in order to make that fit in the stadium, you'd have to remove the giant mitt in center field, or drain McCovey's Cove. But I think all Giants fans would agree that honoring the greatest moment in the team's rivalry with the Dodgers would be perfect: an animatronic version of Juan Marichal cracking a bat over Johnny Roseboro's head, over and over.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 10:26 AM 3 comments  

Maple bats must destroy all humans

As referenced on this site recently, maple bats have replaced global warming, terrorism and human-created black holes as the No. 1 threat to humanity. This past Friday was just another example, as Rockies SS Troy Tulowitzki had a bat shatter in his hand during a game against the Marlins, causing a gash on his right hand that required 16 stitches and landed him on the disabled list.

Of course, this didn't happen during an at-bat but after Tulowitzki smashed it into the ground after being lifted for a pinch-hitter. As Sports by Brooks points out, it's not Tulowitzki's fault. Plus, the bat totally had it coming: you should have seen how it was dressed.

The big thing to keep in mind is that the maple bats have progressed from on-the-field attacks to the dugout. What's next? All I know is that someone needs to go back ASAP and make sure there weren't any maple bats lurking around Darryl Kile's hotel room. Someone get the chick from "Cold Case" on this.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 12:25 PM 0 comments  

Seriously,...Will Leitch is still there?

Several weeks ago, Deadspin editor/co-founder Will Leitch announced that he was officially leaving the blog to take on a contributing writer role at New York Magazine. At least I think it was a few weeks ago - it might have been four or five months ago for all I know. That's sure what the never-ending litany of stories about it on Deadspin and other sites is making it seem like.

What with all the farewells, speculation on who is going to replace him, and open weeping in the Deadspin comments, you would think that Walter Cronkite was retiring rather than that a pasty fellow who spent most of his days holed up in his Brooklyn apartment making dick jokes about Sean Salisbury was going to be going on to primarily write somewhere else - while still writing where he is now from time to time.

It's starting to feel like the last guest at the party. You know the one: it's 2:30 in the morning, everyone else has left, you're ready to finish cleaning up and/or pass out, and there's the one person who is still there, and still wants to talk to you about stock options, or the Colts defensive line, or African politics. And of course, he won't take the hint that it's time for him to leave, no matter how many exaggerated you make, or how many times you say things like "Wow, look how late it is. Don't you have a long drive home?"

I think this all points to how isolated and insular the sports blogosphere (and God, I hate using that pretentious fucking word) is. Essentially existing in your own, marginalized part of the world has caused dozens of otherwise sensible people to lose all manner of perspective, and start acting like this is Argentina in 1952, and Will Leitch leaving Deadspin equals Eva Peron dying. "Don't Cry for Me, Blogosphere" indeed. (Or, like this is Wisconsin and Will is Brett Favre.)

I like Will. I've had beers with the man. I've played "Guitar Hero" against him. I'm happy that he's moving on to a new challenge. But seriously...this all needs to wrap up soon. Someone start playing "Closing Time" over the bar loudspeakers. "You don't have to go home but you can't stay here" and all that jazz. The collective amount of their shit that everyone is losing speaks to a massive inferiority complex on the part of everyone in the blog community, leading to a massive overreaction to relatively minor news.

Oh, I'll be on vacation next week, so the frequency of posts will drop while I'm out. (I know, I know, down from "glacial" to "non-existent". Ha ha ha and shut up.) I however do fully expect daily eulogies and remembrances from fknmclane while I am gone. After 9 months of blogging, it's the least I could expect. Really, you're too kind.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 3:34 PM 1 comments  

Dozen of tractors overturned in Fresno following College World Series win

FRESNO, CA - Law enforcement officials picked through the debris Thursday morning after celebrations turned violent following Fresno State's College World Series-clinching win over Georgia the previous night. Raucous fans left overturned hundreds of pieces of farm equipment and left countless heads of cattle, sheep and other livestock "startled but otherwise unharmed."

The harsh light of morning revealed tractors, harvesters and balers that had been overturned during the celebrations by out-of-control fans. Officers in helicopter patrols during the night had reported multiple incidents of fires being started in celebration, but later investigations discovered that these were merely cases of farmers performing regularly-planning burning of leaves, weeds and other agricultural rubbish.

Still, many area residents who went to sleep to the sounds of wild celebrations woke up to a tremendous shock this morning. John Mosesian is a farmer with a 1,200 acre grape vineyard in Fowler.

"I start going to bed, next thing I know, I hear all this shouting and hollering coming from down the road," Mosesian said. "I just thought it was the neighbors getting into it again, so I went to bed. I wake up in the morning, and someone's set my compost heap on fire, and my rotary tiller's been dumped on its side."

Mosesian paused to survey the damage before reflecting on the clean-up effort.

"It's a damn shame - it's going to take hours for Juan, Jose, Paco and Manuel to clean all this up, and they still have 12 hours of field work to do," he said, shaking his head. "They'll be here well past sundown."

Mosesian then drove off in his pick-up to his traditional two-hour breakfast at Lou's Diner with other hard-working farmers.

There were no confirmed reports of injuries or deaths following the incidents, although three Visalia men were arrested and charged with public intoxication and animal cruelty after tossing a pig into the air repeatedly in celebration. The pig was slaughtered as planned later in the morning and was said by observers to be "delicious."

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 2:19 PM 0 comments  

MLB responds to rash of broken bat injuries by switching to maple balls

NEW YORK - Commissioner Bud Selig today announced that as a result of a string of injuries resulting from shattered bats made from maple culminating in an injury to a plate umpire at yesterday's Royals/Rockies game, MLB will be switching to maple baseball effective immediately.

"Based on recent events, we wanted to react quickly to ensure the safety of our players and umpire," said Selig. "However, because of the collective bargaining agreement with the Players' Union, we cannot ban maple bats, so we've decided to do the next best thing."

Selig said that despite MLB having done no testing, he believed switching to maple balls would solve the problem.

"I mean, obviously these maple bats are breaking because they aren't as strong and sturdy as the baseballs they are hitting," said Selig. "The answer, then, is to make sure that what the bat is striking has the same basic density as the bat itself. If we make the balls out of maple, we accomplish that."

Selig said he had asked Rawlings to immediately switch production from the traditional leather, twine and cork baseballs to the new, all-wood models. According to Selig, Rawlings has told him that they would only be able to accomplish this so quickly by using a production plant in India.

"Rawlings has told be that they would be able to start sending me the new "Cricket" line of baseballs almost immediately," said Selig. "I don't know how they were able to have these ready to go so quickly, but thank God that they did."

Players were mixed in their reaction to the announcement. The vast majority of pitchers were "shocked and appalled" at the decision.

"These balls, they're like 1/3rd of the weight of a real baseball," said reigning Cy Young MVP Jake Peavy, "and they don't have seams on them. How the hell am I supposed to do anything but lob a meatball over the plate that's going to get hit 600 feet with this thing?"

Not all pitchers were as negative. Former Cy Young winner Barry Zito said that the new ball would "even" the playing field between himself and other pitchers with "stuff", "location" and "velocity".

If this failed to fix the problem, Selig said, MLB has already contacted Wiffle Inc. as a Plan B.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 11:41 AM 1 comments  

Coverage of Kalitta crash raises questions

As I'm sure you've heard, champion drag racer Scott Kalitta was killed on Saturday when his funny car blew out an engine and then crashed at nearly 300 mph while he was making his final qualifying pass for the NHRA race at Englishtown, NJ. The main eliminations took place as scheduled yesterday, although in a very subdued manner. Racing went on, as the cliche says, because "Scott would have wanted it that way."

(Note: Just so there's no question what I want, let me make this clear. When I die, I want the mourning process to be incredibly, stupidly intense. Like after a champion boxer from Latin America is killed in the ring. I would like all blogs that have linked to me, that I've linked to, or that might have heard of me to shut down for at least three days after my death out of respect, and the inability to move forward because they are so personally crushed. Thanks.)

The cause of the accident is currently being investigated, and the NHRA has pledged to take those findings and make any necessary changes to limit the risks for other drivers in the future. (I said "limit" since even though drag racing cars are much safer than they were even five years ago, there is no such thing as a 100 percent safe car.) Some things are clear: the engine in Kalitta's car exploded when he reached the end of his quarter-mile run, creating an explosion forceful enough to raise the car off the ground and buckle it into two. Kalitta was unable to stop the car - either he was knocked unconscious from the initial engine explosion or the brake lines had been severed in the blast - and he went through the gravel pit at the end of the runway meant to stop runaway cars, through some addiitonal netting and into a large pole, where it there exploded in a huge fireball and basically disintegrated while sending parts into the woods behind the track.

There is already a lot of speculation on if the "run-off" area at the Englishtown track is large enough to handle a runaway dragster. Many people familiar with the sport - including two-time funny car champ Tony Pedregon - have expressed the opinion that the run-off area is far too short at the Englishtown track, and that this was a major factor as to why Kalitta's crash was fatal. Needless to say, there are going to be a lot of questions asked about this in the weeks to come, and the NHRA needs to have some pretty damned good answers.

But beyond mentioning the crash itself, I want to talk about the coverage of the crash, primarily by ESPN. As you might have noticed, I haven't posted the video of the crash yet. If you want to watch it, here it is - I'm sure not going to embed the clip. But you are all big boys and girls, and I'll let you make the decision on watching it for yourself.

There was a lot of hand-wringing on the Deadspin late night comments thread on Saturday night about two things: the size of the run-off area at the track, and ESPN's coverage of the accident and its aftermath. Specifically, there seemed to be a general agreement that ESPN has being ghoulish or appealing to the viewers' prurient nature by showing footage of the crash over and over.

First off, I watched the 10 p.m. Sportscenter on Saturday night (at least 10 p.m. on the West Coast, check your local listing for dates and times). In their segnent in the accident, they showed the footage of the crash exactly one time, preceded by a warning the the footage was "disturbing." On the ESPN2 tape-delayed coverage of qualifying (which was canceled after the crash), they also showed the accident once, and spent the rest of the time talking to drivers in the pits about Scott Kalitta. And on ESPN News immediately after it was announced that Kalitta had been killed, they broadcast the footage once every "show" (i.e. half-hour), with the same warning that Sportscenter had.

And I suspect that part of the problem is that people were getting confused because of the sheer frequency of ESPN's broadcasts, and equating that with the footage being shown "over and over." If ESPN re-runs the same Sportscenter eight times in one evening, it might feel like you can't turn on ESPN without seeing that crash. Add in ESPN News, the coverage of the actual event, etc...people tend to jumble things in their minds anyway (which is why most people are not reliable witnesses), and seeing it a few times on repeated programming can seem like it's being shown on an endless loop.

If you watched the footage, you'll notice it's not particularly "graphic" - from the angle that ESPN has released, you really don't see much of the crash into the barrier itself, just a giant ball of dust and smoke and flames. As much as people want to make the comparison, this clip isn't the same as when Greg Moore was killed in a CART race at Fontana several years ago, where ESPN essentially refused to show any replays of the accident. This was footage of a closed vehicle crash from a wide-angle shot; the Greg Moore crash footage is a much tighter angle of an open-wheel car, where the car flipped and hit an inside retaining wall. Basically, you can see a human body get crushed against a wall at 200 mph and flip, still in the "tub" of the cockpit but lifeless and limp, along the grass. Needless to say, I'm not linking to that clip - find it yourself if you are so inclined.

But beyond all of this, the question remains - does ESPN "need" to show the footage at all? After all, this isn't Joe Theisman's leg, which was gross and painful, but not anything near fatal. Couldn't ESPN cover the story without showing the footage?

Personally, I think ESPN has a obligation to show the footage in a responsible manner, which I think that they did. There is inherent news value in the footage of the crash, and not just grim fascination like it's from some "Faces of Death" video. Seeing the video and how the crash unfolded gives fans the chance to form their own conclusions on what happened. You can see how the track is laid out, and how much (or little) run-off space there is. I can guarantee you that the outrage over the track set-up wouldn't be nearly as loud as it is (or will get) if there was no footage of the crash made public right after the accident. And the NHRA needs to answer these questions, whether they are at fault or not - for the sake of their drivers and their fans who pay good money to take their families to the races and would prefer that they didn't have to explain to their kids on the drive home why that driver who crashed isn't racing ever again.

Should they be "showing it over and over?" No, and I don't think that they did. And I think they have a duty to choose what angles are shown - having watched a lot of races over the years, I promise you that there is footage from a camera stationed after the finish line that would show the crash in much more horrific detail, and ESPN chose not to release it. (I find it interesting to compare the coverage of this crash to the crash that killed Gordon Smiley in qualifying for the 1982 Indianapolis 500 - where his car went head on into the wall at 200 mph and basically broke apart like a missile hit it. It was one the most graphic and disturbing crashes I've ever seen, but ABC showed a replay of it to lead off their broadcast along with news that Smiley was dead - the crash happened before the broadcast began - and ABC Nightly News showed a different, still icky angle in their broadcast.) ESPN doesn't need to show blood and guts to do its job, but they do need to report the news, even if it's troubling.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 8:47 AM 2 comments  

That Bulldog fever

The Fresno State Bulldogs were thwarted in their first attempt to make it to the College World Series final series, as North Carolina rallied for a 4-3 victory on Saturday night to force a rematch today, with the winner moving on to face Georgia. Now, normally, I wouldn't pay too much attention to the College World Series - somehow, I've managed to remain immune to the "ping" of metal bats. But...Fresno State's run to the precipice of the College World Series final series is significant enough to make me care, and that's not just because I grew up 20 miles away from Fresno.

What Fresno State is attempting to pull off, frankly, would be the equivalent of a No. 16 seed winning the NCAA Men's Basketball tournament. Quite literally - they were a No. 4 seed out of four teams in their sub-regional - essentially one of the 16 lowest-ranked teams in the tournament (so I guess they could have been as high as a No. 13 seed, but...quit ruining the narrative with your math, Mr. Math!). After making it through that, they took down nationally-ranked Arizona St. on the road to punch their ticket to Omaha - despite the Sun Devils' "fake fight", which I haven't mentioned here yet, but it's one of the stupid things I've ever heard of. Even my kickball team - the one that almost burned down our park this season - wouldn't pull something that stupid.

It's pretty amazing stuff. As I've mentioned here before, the local community has a special bond with Fresno State teams, especially the baseball team, which is almost entirely made up of players from the area. The whole Central Valley will rally around a Fresno State team when it does well, especially because in each local town like Visalia or Turlock or Hanford, there is a kid that plays on the team, and that they can rally behind. At least, they would if everyone in town wasn't too busy hiding out in their houses with the air conditioning cranked up, afraid to turn the TV on for fear that the heat from the TV will be the tipping point that causes the house to catch fire.

Posted by The Duke of Everything at 1:08 AM 0 comments