Let's whore Morrissey out for every NFL team

As I'm sure you've seen and heard if you've watched more than 10 minutes of a NFL broadcast this season, the NFL Network is using Morrissey's "Everyday Is Like Sunday" as the centerpiece of their new advertising campaign. Apparently, it was only the second most wholly-inappropriate 80s song they could find, but the royalties cost for U2's "Sunday Bloody Sunday" were just too high. If you haven't seen the commercial yet, here it is:



Which got me thinking: if you're going to use one Morrissey song, why not dip into ihs whole back catalog, including his songs with The Smiths? I have some suggestions that the NFL Network could use to create team-specific commercials for this season:

• Panic - New England Patriots (they might want to change the chorus to "hang Matt Cassel, hang Matt Cassel, hang Matt Cassel")
• The Last of the Famous International Playboys - Arizona Cardinals (lots of shots of Matt Leinart partying with coeds cut with him sitting on the sidelines)
• How Soon Is Now? - For the young, upstart Buffalo Bills
• The Ordinary Boys - Dallas Cowboys
• There's A Place In Hell For Me And My Friends - Detroit Lions
• Bigmouth Strikes Again - Cincinnati Bengals (featuring highlights of Chad Ocho Cinco)
• We Hate It When Our Friends Become Successful - Green Bay Packers
• The More You Ignore Me, The Closer I Get - The suddenly 5-0 Tennessee Titans
• You're The One For Me, Fatty - Philadelphia Eagles, focusing on corpulent head coach Andy Reid
• You Have Killed Me - Kansas City Chiefs, with highlights of Tony Gonzalez walking off the field following defeat after defeat
• This Charming Man - New York Jets
• Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now - Seattle Seahawks